Airing my Philthy Laundry

Fashion Police

I've been irked lately by women's fashion. I work in a professional environment, where the men dress professionally, and women are allowed to dress in business casual. This usually ends up with me sitting in a shirt and tie, yanking at the collar of my neck, while my female cohorts are sitting in khakis and a cotton t-shirt (oh they say that they're professional because they bought them at express, or banana republic...but they were still made in the same sweatshops that my casual clothing was made in.) In addition, when they move in any direction, usually the top of their underwear shows since the shirts are too short, and the pants are low rise.

So in order combat this, i've appointed myself as an official member of the Chicago Fashion Police Squad. Whenever i see exposed stomach, lower back, or especially underwear on a woman, I start making a siren noise loudly and pointing at the exposed area. Not only does it attract attention from everyone within earshot, but it also sends the girls squirming to pull their shirts down and pants up.

I encourage men everywhere to stand up for the decent women of America who leave more to the imagination. Join the local fashion police in your community and put a stop to unnecessary PDT (public display of thong)

posted by philthy @ 3:58 PM